English, 04.09.2020 14:01 sofyan00404

30 points please help I really don't understand can you please revise my paragraph and make it have no passive voice and change the Syntax (sentence structure). In the beginning, it all began with Ralph Baer in 1967 in Nashua, NH. In 1966, while working for Sanders Associates Inc., engineer Ralph Baer began to investigate how to play games on TV. And as a result of his investigations Brown Box was created. According to the G-Phoria Legend Award, “Baer is considered "the Father of Video Games due to his many contributions to games and helping to spark the video game industry in the latter half of the 20th century”. Little did we know this great invention would be in everyone's life today.

4/5 Coherence
5/15 Syntax (sentence structure) - highlight the changes made to the syntax
5/10 Voice (no passive voice) - highlight the changes made to the voice
5/15 Reflection Paragraph --Describe the specific revisions you made regarding SYNTAX and VOICE to demonstrate your understanding of those concepts.
Explain how your changes improved the paragraph.

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30 points please help I really don't understand can you please revise my paragraph and make it have...

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