Is this a great essay for my social studies class? To: The State Department

From: Agent Carter

I am writing this report today to explain the major causes behind the mysterious death of Egypt’s pharaoh King Tut around the year 1323 BCE. For years this event has been ignored. However, after analyzing the evidence in this case, I have some startling news to share. First, I will explain to you several theories that make the most sense. Then, I will tell you what I believe caused the death of King Tut.
As you know King Tut mysteriously died. So as I was investigating his death, I discovered some reasons on why his death is so mysterious. He could have died from a disease that was described to make his bones shatter and weaken and as they shattered they could have punctured one of his organs or heart. He may didnt feel it as it hit it in the beginning but as he continued to move it could have hit an important vessel and killed him.
Another way he could have died was murder. He had an advisor that went by the name Aye. Before he became King Tut’s advisor he was King Tut's father advisor. Now King Tut’s father did things to make his citizens/kingdom hate him. So when he died and his nine year old son became king people could have wanted to take their anger out on King Tut. Aye on the other hand could have just been jealous of King Tut. So he could have waited until he was an adult to kill him because it would be too obvious to kill him as soon as he just became king. Now he could have been beaten to death but it wasn't too much evidence to prove that. It is said the Aye married King Tut’s wife right after he died. Now why would he marry King Tut’s wife so early.
Another way he could have died was his other advisor Horemheb. Now Horemheb did things that wouldn’t make sense to do if you weren't jealous. Why would you get things that proved King Tut’s existence removed and destroyed if you weren’t jealous? Now he was King Tut’s advisor so he would have had plenty of time to be alone with King Tut. Now with all the time he has alone with King Tut he had enough time to kill him and clean up the mess.
Now, what I think happened is that Aye and Horemheb teamed up and murdered King Tut together because if they didnt why would they do the things they did if they hadn’t? Plus if one person killed King Tut why didn’t they kill the other? Now they both could have killed him and one of them could have cleaned up the mess while the other made it seem like the king just mysteriously just died. Now this could be true but we are not one hundred percent sure. Now if this is true this would explain why it was so “Mysterious”. I don't know what exactly happened. I just know he couldn’t have fallen off the chariot because it wouldn’t have been mysterious then.