Hey guys could you check these out for me and read them, i'm questioning having a job in comedy so technically this withins limits cause it can help me with a future career, just read these and tell what you think!!! This is for an older audience, and 1 equals first person, and 2 equals second person! 1;"Surgery is just sta-bb-ing someone to life"
2;"please never become a surgeon"

1;''I have never l-ied to you, I have always told you some version of the truth,"
2; "the truth doesn't have versions!'.

1"all you do is kil-l people"
2:" thats like saying all motzart did was write songs".

1: 'I think i've finally gotten over my fe-ar of ghosts"
2: thats the sprit!"
1; Oh cru-d! where!'

1;why can't trees make something useful, like wifi'
2; so screw oxygen i guess'

1;lasagna is spaghettie cake"
2: how high are you?'
1;"5"1'.

1;Apologize!'
2; Un-f##K you i guess"

1:I want to di-e!
2: Don't be like that were in this together!
1; you're right! We want to di-e!
2; NO!

1: That goes against my moral compass.
2: Your moral compass is an fing roulette wheel'

1: Why is he carrying around a potted plant?
2: He said so many stu-pid things today i'm making him cary that to make up for the oxygen he wasted".

1; you alright?
2:yeah why?
1: You asked the woman at the store if damage repair shampoo also works on emotions.

1: As you can see were professionals!
2: those two just die-d!
1; As you can see, im a professional!

1; I don't have a resting Bi#ch face my Bi#ch face is always awake and working.