REVISION ASSIGNMENT: rewrite the first paragraph with two ideas in mind. 1) Make sure all the sentences are complete with a subject and predicate. 2) Give me a Thesis Statement that gets closer to the big idea you wanted to express in this essay rather than simply a detail from the story. heres the paragraph below

One balmy late summer night, my amazing mother and father surprised me with flight tickets to ancient Greece..their homeland. A country I never thought i’d be lucky enough to visit especially at such a young age. I jumped up and down in excitement, unsure of how to thank my lovely parents. I knew I had to start packing right away because our trip was just a few days away. Comes around the day of our flight, my family and I are all ready to hop on this super long flight and get to beautiful Greece. Twelve hours on a flight was super exhausting but the moment we touched down, we completely forgot all of our tiredness. As we exited the airport I instantly felt a fresh breeze of air sway past my face. There were breathtaking flowers every way you turned your head.

the eye wink at the hand; yet let that be / which the eye fears, when it is done, to see.

it is partly in consequence of such facts, that slaves, when inquired of as to their condition and the character of their masters, almost universally say they are contented, and that their masters are kind. the slaveholders have been known to send in spies among their slaves, to ascertain their views and feelings in regard to their condition. the frequency of this has had the effect to establish among the slaves the maxim, that a still tongue makes a wise head. they suppress the truth rather than take the consequences of telling it, and in so doing prove themselves a part of the human family. if they have any thing to say of their masters, it is generally in their masters' favor, especially when speaking to an untried man. i have been frequently asked, when a slave, if i had a kind master, and do not remember ever to have given a negative answer; nor did i, in pursuing this course, consider myself as uttering what was absolutely false; for i always measured the kindness of my master by the standard of kindness set up among slaveholders around us. moreover, slaves are like other people, and imbibe prejudices quite common to others. they think their own better than that of others. many, under the influence of this prejudice, think their own masters are better than the masters of other slaves; and this, too, in some cases, when the very reverse is true. indeed, it is not uncommon for slaves even to fall out and quarrel among themselves about the relative goodness of their masters, each contending for the superior goodness of his own over that of the others."