I’m currently a grade 3 student in english language and practising in order to improve. below are an extract and my answer for english language paper 1 question 2.
, could you just skim/read over it and tell me approximately what mark or grade i would get and what i could do to improve.

extract
mr fisher remembered a time – surely, not so long ago – when books were golden, when imaginations soared, when the world was filled with stories which ran like gazelles and pounced like tigers and exploded like rockets, illuminating minds and hearts. he had seen it happen; had seen whole classes swept away in the fever. in those days, there were heroes; there were dragons and dinosaurs; there were space adventurers and soldiers of fortune and giant apes. in those days, thought mr fisher, we dreamed in colour, though films were in black and white, and good always triumphed in the end.

answer

in the text, the writer uses metaphors and emotive language to convey mr fishers devotion and fondness for books. he describes books as ‘golden’. the past-tense adjective ‘golden’ is metaphorically employed to illustrate mr fishers views on books as a precious, rare and as luxurious commodities of great value which ‘illuminate minds and hearts’. the use of the past-tense adjective ‘golden’ also conveys mr fishers notions that the rest of the world have reformed their views and do not share the same affection mr fisher has towards books and stories of the past. the writer personifies books as ‘illuminating minds and hearts’ which implies his view of books affecting the individual as a whole and enriching them with ideas and creativity. joanne harris could have used this language to illustrate his passion towards books and stories and to bring about awareness that books have lost the value they had ‘not so long ago’. the use of language and vivid imagery can nudge the reader to realize the value that books have and perhaps encourage them to ‘dream in colour’ and open up their imagination and creativity. mr fisher thought ‘the world was filled with stories which ran like gazelles and pounced like tigers. the metaphor, ‘ran like gazelles’ suggests that the stories where fast-paced, interesting and action-packed, gazelles being a species of antelope which run up to 97km/h. this notion of the reader being hooked by the book is reinforced with the metaphor ‘pounced like tigers’ which connotes an image of a predator (‘tiger’) and a prey (‘gazelles’) which further leads to the reader being immersed and glued to the words on the page. the use of these vivid metaphors suggests that mr fisher was thinking of a time where books and therefore people were imaginative and creative with vivid and excitable ideas in their minds. the extract starts with a long complex sentence which is overwhelming and almost difficult to read, ‘mr fisher remembered a time…illuminating minds and hearts.’ this wordy and eloquent sentence perhaps is used to reflect mr fishers love and passion towards books as he is trying to cram all his thoughts and feelings into a sentence to persuade or inspire the reader to take on and understand his opinion.